The Easiest Way To Start a New Habit
Starting a new habit is hard. Once you start you have to fight the resistance to maintain it. Eventually the habit you thought would show up is instead nothing but a new battle you’ve added to an already hectic life. Once this happens you’re forced to rely on willpower.
Willpower is NOT a good solution for longterm sustainability. Willpower will work for a while, but eventually it just ends up as an internal battle. We can only battle for so long before we grow weary. The trouble is, we won’t remember the high of starting the new habit. We will only remember the battle.
Let’s say you’ve wanted to start working out and you haven’t. You’ve wanted to start meditating. You haven’t. It’s almost a quarter into the new year and those well intended resolutions are getting smaller and smaller in the rear view mirror.
However, you already have hard wired habits right now at your disposal to take advantage of. These existing habits and routines are HUGE tools for starting new habits. You already brush your teeth right (Lord I hope so)? You drive your car right? You go to bed right? Crush the Wordle every day right? Well, there you go! You already have exiting habits you can use as cues to begin other desired habits.
Building habits are one thing. But starting them is something completely different. I think we often look at habit formation like using a hoolahoop. We start it spinning around, make some awful and hilarious looking girations with our pelvis then the hoop falls. We try again. Nothing. Then like magic, we don’t know why but for some reason the hoop starts spinning around our mid section. Those times we keep it going. The other times we try and try and it just doesn’t spin we give up. Why is it so hard to get the hoop to spin? Well, it’s because there’s never any other time of the day we swirl our hips like that. If you do, you’re weird.
Instead when we try to hoolahoop we are asking our body and mind to take on something completely new. This makes it that much harder. There are times when challenges like hoolahooping are absolutely beneficial. However, habit formation isn’t like skill formation. We don’t want to grind it out until we perfect the act. We want to make this as easy and frictionless as we possibly can.
For a lot of people habits are like that. We try to start them then nothing. We try again. Nothing. Then there are some that catch. Like the hoop they just stick and we really don’t know why. I have a suggestion.
If you want to start a habit that will stick the best thing you can do is make it easy. Don’t rearrange your life for the new habit. Don’t reorganize your entire day so you can start working out. Want to start the practice of journaling? Ok. Don’t decide to journal at a time and place you currently don’t do anything.
If you do, here’s what you are telling your brain to process-
New Thing,
New Place,
New Discipline,
New Time,
Rearrange Everything We Used To Do At This Time
All this adds up to one big pain in the a**. This means you are a lot less likely to stick with it. Why? Because your brain is an energy optimizer. The more resistance you add to the process, the more energy it requires and the more your brain will say to you, “Yea, let’s not do that. You need to conserve my energy for more important matters.”
I suggest using the B.J. Fogg method for habit stacking. The idea is to stick the desired habit in the middle of something you already do on a regular basis. Think of it as deciding to toss a tiny boat in an already flowing river.
Here are some examples from James Clear’s book, ”Atomic Habits.”
Meditation-After I pour my cup of coffee each morning , I will meditate for one minute
Exercise-After I take off my work shoes, I will immediately change into my workout clothes
Gratitude-After I sit down to dinner, I will say one thing I’m grateful for that happened today
Marriage-After I get into bed at night, I will give my partner a kiss
Safety-After I put on my running shoes, I will text a friend or family member where I am running and how long it will take.
Add to What You Already Do
When I wanted to make sure and read every day, I decided to make it a part of my already existing morning routine
The key for starting any habit is to make it as easy as possible. We tend to think of these resolutions to be a better person or improve always in ALL ways (that’s really inspiring line. Someone should use that as a mantra) as something that requires rearranging our entire person. That’s dumb.
Sneak the habit into a routine you already follow. Make it easy on the brain. It’s like adding a 5lb weight to the bar vs. a 20lb plate. You’ve added some benefit, but not so much that it shocks the system.
I tend to be horrible at remembering to take my supplements. When I drink my protein shake that’s a trigger that it’s time to take my supplements. I just added taking the supplements to the already well formed habit of making a protein shake every day. Easy as pie. The protein shake is now a cue to take the supplements.
I once read an article about a guy who refused to use a suitcase with wheels on it. He said it just felt like cheating. He was a serious business executive and serious business executives should carry serious expensive leather garment bags. It’s more professional
Finally, after watching scores of other travelers breeze through airports with suitcases zipping along behind them like loyal dogs he made a truly executive decision. He’d ditched the “serious” luggage for a suitcase with wheels. From then on he wondered why the hell he didn’t do it much sooner.
Don’t think because you make something easier it loses it’s impact or seriousness. It’s just smart. Want to do more physical activity, but you have no idea where to fit a real workout in? Decide to do 20 air squats or jumping jacks every time you are about to leave your house and get in the car.
CUE>Getting In Car CRAVING>To be more fit >RESPONSE Do 20 Air Squats >REWARD Habit of doing more physical exercise on a regular basis
Starting habits is hard. Maintaining them can be even harder. Make the entire process of habit formation as simple as possible.
Want to learn more about habit formation? Checkout my upcoming 6 Week Vitruvian Challenge. I spend an entire week on habit forming. I give you the science behind good habit formation and how to make them stick. Learn more HERE.