Live Into The Person You Want to Be This Holiday Season
Is there a mismatch between who you are and who you want to be? If you are a high performer, the answer is most likely, “yes.” That’s because most high performers have a vision of who they are, but they also have another vision. It’s the person they are striving to be.
I know what some of you are saying. “Wait Jason. I like myself just the way I am. I accept who I am.” Ok fine. However, you can do better. I can do better. There is always room for growth. Further, if you are content to stay stagnant and not improve. Stop reading. No hard feelings.
However, if you are someone wanting to continue growing your mind, better your habits, be a better friend, father, son, daughter, lover then keep reading. You’re my kinda guy or gal.
This being the case, do me a favor. Close your eyes. Now imagine all the people in your family. Think of them deeply. See their faces. If each of these folks had to describe you in three words or less, which ones would they use? C’mon. Think hard. Do you even have a clue? I bet you do. Now. I want you to think of the three words or less you want them to say. Have you earned them? If not, keep reading.
We are about to launch the holiday season. We will gather this Thursday for Thanksgiving. Over the course of the next couple months, if we are so fortunate, we will see many members of our immediate and extended family. What words will they use to describe their time with you?
I have a challenge for you. I want you to first take out your phone. Now I want you to set a reminder with an alert for three different times of the day each with one of the words you came up with. As you prepare to join family for the holidays, commit to putting those three words into action.
Many people will show up having given little to no thought about this. Instead they will walk in on the defensive about some old family wound (not that I’ve EVER done such a thing). I’ve just heard of people who do this. Maybe you will be on a mission to defend why Trump announcing his presidency is the one thing that’s going to save America. Maybe you’re prepared to let anyone who brings up the name Trump know he is a fascist buffoon who’s going to eventually end democracy in America.
Between you and me, I think you can do better. I doubt your three words had anything to do with ideology, hurts, grudges or anything like that.
I challenge you to go out and try to earn those descriptors. Actually envision the conversations. You know your family. You know the many of the subjects that will come up. Play them out in your head. Rehearse your responses. Prepare to be pissed off without reacting. Prepare to make people feel better about insecurities. Prepare to ask questions about the things that important to those you speak to. Be kind. Be gentle. Show grace. Show love. Be prepared.
So those of you high performers still reading are now saying to me, “So you’re telling me to go act, Jason? I’m supposed to just put on a happy face and try to act out the person I hope these people one day say I am?”
No. I’m asking you to live with intentionality. Be deliberate in your actions and your relationships. World renown performance coach Brendon Burchard once said, “It’s almost impossible to just go through the motions when you have clear and compelling intentions.”
This statement reminded me of my high school football days. I hated football. I couldn’t stand it. However, I was good, and my Dad loved me playing football. One day I shared with my coach my disdain for the game.
Shocked he said, “Are you serious? How do you play with such intensity?”
To which I replied, “Well, I’m not going to go out and embarrass myself.” I also wasn’t going to embarrass my Dad who was always in the stands. I wanted to make him proud. My clear intentions wouldn’t allow me to just go through the motions of playing football. They propelled me to become an All State player and go to college on a NCAA scholarship.
This holiday season challenge yourself to be the person you want to be right now.
Happy Thanksgiving!