I’m a flawed human. We all are. However, I want to get better. Heck, the motto for my podcast is “Improve always in ALL ways.” That literally means ALL ways even the ones I don’t want to tackle. 

One of these areas is the act of forgiveness. I’ve been known to hold onto bitterness and unforgiveness. Why is this? Well, it’s pretty simple. If I forgive the person who wronged me, I’m letting them off the hook. I’m letting down my guard. This leaves me open to be hurt again. No sir. I must keep the bitterness alive. Shoot. I’m not doing them any favors by forgiving them either. I’m enabling their bad behavior.

Have you ever thought these thoughts? Yea. I thought so. Well, I’m here to tell you I’ve learned in this journey the person being forgiven isn’t the one benefiting the most. In fact, if they are a decent human even if you offer forgiveness they will most likely live with the pain of the harm they inflicted for a long time.

However, you win. I win. We not only get to be happier, but we will be healthier. It turns out the old saying, “Holding on to bitterness is like drinking poison hoping the other person dies,” holds some truth. 

I’m about to launch a two part series on The Jason Wright Show about the heart. I’m coming at it from two very different directions. One will be purely health related. I had the opportunity to sit down with Dr. Stephen Hussey, the author of the books “The Health Evolution” and “Understanding The Heart.”

In this conversation we actually touched on the often overlooked role anger, stress and anxiety play in heart health. Dr. Hussey made a great point during the conversation. He pointed out how humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can actually create life threatening scenarios in our head. We can literally put ourselves in a fight or flight state without anything actually happening.

This is not good. This can be damaging to our heart. When we don’t forgive we add stress, anger and anxiety to our lives. Therefore, we can unequivocally make the argument forgiveness is healthy. 

Studies have actually shown the benefits of forgiveness as it relates to health. 

“There is an enormous physical burden to being hurt and disappointed,” notes Karen Swartz, M.D. Director of the Mood Disorders Adult Consultation Clinic at The Johns Hopkins Hospital. 

Stress and anger, both results of unforgiveness, can lead to changes in heart rate, blood pressure and immune response. This can then lead to higher risk of heart disease, depression and diabetes. 

Forgiveness on the other hand leads to lower stress. This is very beneficial to your health. One particular study revealed the impact of depression and cardiovascular health. A broken heart can literally kill you, but you can fix it. Often the cure is learning to forgive. 

In the second part of the series I visit with my personal counselor Lee Poe. Lee has been through many battles with me. It was in his office that the mother of my daughters said divorce was the only option for her happiness. It was in Lee’s office that I questioned whether I would cry at my father’s funeral. It was in Lee’s office that I cried, yelled, punched pillows and then learned to forgive. 

I now look at forgiveness as just another way to improve my health. Maybe I’m a little fanatical about my health and wellness. I’ll own that. Yet I continue to believe this crazy notion of improving always in ALL ways I think is a worthwhile endeavor. 

I hope you will tune into these two episodes. The heart is an amazing piece of biological machinery. It’s to be tended to and understood, which isn’t easy. After all even the Bible says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?”-Jeremiah 17:9 

But the Bible also says, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”-Matthew 6:21 

I don’t know about you, but I treasure my health. I want to be around as long as I can for my family. I want to be healthy while I’m here. If forgiveness isn't just a matter of emotions and relational history but also a matter of good health why wouldn’t I pursue it?

In my conversation with both these professionals you will learn practical advice on how to tend to the heart. I hope you will join me on The Jason Wright Show for a listen.