Rule# 11 Be Comfortable With Uncomfortable

Rule Maker: The Stoics

Learn More The Rule: “Letters from a Stoic”: Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Tomorrow morning get up and take a cold shower. I didn’t say warm, room temperature or lukewarm. I said cold. Turn the dial as far to the right and make the shower as cold as possible. Get in. Don’t think about it. Just get in. Stoic philosophy is something I began studying about 4 years ago at the urging of virtual mentors Tim Ferriss and Ryan Holiday. I then consulted with Stoic Philosopher Seneca and learned exposure to extreme cold, while very uncomfortable is actually very beneficial.

This is the practice of voluntary discomfort. Showers are one of the most comfortable activities of the modern world. How many times have you been in a situation-caught in the rain, fresh off a camping trip, overcoming an illness and a shower was what gave you the aid and comfort you needed? Hot showers are amazing. 

However, cold showers are incredibly beneficial. They help burn fat, increase endorphin levels and put you in a good mood, wake you up and increase your cognitive ability. I find all these things to be secondary to the fact they help us to control our mind instead of letting our mind control us. Let us remember what Publilius Syrus said; “A wise man will be master of his mind, a fool will be its slave.” 

When your mind says stay in bed. Reply with a resounding, “no!” When your mind starts to flood you with all sorts of reasons why not to get in a cold shower, don’t give it time to make its case. Just jump in. Deal with the discomfort then relish the victory. You just kept your mind in it its proper place. You controlled it not the other way around. You have also taken a step toward accepting and living with discomfort. The more discomfort we can endure the less discomfort can impact our lives. 

This doesn’t mean we should get in the habit of being self hating sadists. I remember one time I sat with a friend and started to tell him about my study of stoic philosophy. He immediately started mocking me by making a motion as to simulate whipping his own back. I remember I got so aggravated because self punishment is not what stoicism is about at all. It’s about training one’s mind and body to endure the inevitable discomforts of life which will certainly come regardless of wealth, health or position. It’s training oneself to take a blow but still achieve a task at a peak level to keep driving forward. It’s about taming the mind. Once the mind is tamed, trained and put in its proper place our actions and the outcomes thereof will be infinitely better. 

Whether you are about to make a huge change or just considering it in the future, conditioning oneself to discomfort is of utmost importance. Deciding to make a drastic life-change is going to be uncomfortable so why not get used to it. Seneca would expose himself to discomfort on a regular basis. He may only eat bread and water for a period of time. He might sleep on a concrete floor. Whatever the simulation it was meant to show him a couple things. One was the worst case scenario should he lose his wealth and privilege. Seneca was a very wealthy and influential man in his time. He was a direct advisor to the Emperor. He also had great wealth.

Like any other pruning process discomfort is one that generally yields benefits. Running a marathon is uncomfortable, but the people who do it make it almost a religion. Going to graduate school is uncomfortable. Telling your spouse you love her when she’s infuriated you is uncomfortable. Forgiving an enemy is uncomfortable. However, in each of these instances on the other side is freedom and conditioning of the mind. You control the discomfort and you decide how much you can bear.

I’ve learned a few inalienable truths during my time on this planet. One of them is I have yet to find a way to keep my body in shape, my lungs functioning at a peak capacity and my heart optimally conditioned without being uncomfortable for about 30 minutes to an hour almost every day. It’s not comfortable to be in my garage at 6 a.m. with Tony Horton or Shaun T barking orders through the screen of my iPad. It’s not comfortable for me to sit on my Peloton for 45 minutes riding and sweating with my heart rate nearing  85% of its maximum capacity while Matt Wilpers shines his boyish grin the whole time. However, this is the only way I’ve found to stay fit. I must be willing to make myself uncomfortable every day to improve. One of my favorite sayings is you cannot get stronger by reading a book about pushups. You have to do the work. It will be uncomfortable, but in the end the improvement will come.

The single most uncomfortable circumstance I ever found myself in was in China. I had agreed to go on a mission trip with some guys from church. During one of the treks, which started with the scariest and most harrowing rides up the Himalayan foothills one could imagine we set out on a trek that changed my life forever.

Three hours into the hike I was covered in leaches and dehydrated. My vision was blurry and I literally didn’t think I could take another step. After a day of climbing up some of the most unforgiving terrain I have ever witnessed with a 50 pound pack on my back I made my way to a small farm. I immediately threw up the only thing in my stomach in a pig pen, threw off my back and fell backwards. I have never been so happy to lie on a dirt floor. The coolness of the floor was the most amazing thing I had ever encountered to that point.

For the past two days I had been taking what I thought were my last few steps on earth. I did not think I would return to my family back home. I beat myself up wondering why I had done something so irresponsible. Now I was lying on the back “porch” of the “Happy Han Man.” The Happy Han Man was the way the missionaries who had gone before us described a sweet man who would be willing to help should we cross his path.

Not long after collapsing on his back porch, he spotted a piece of paper in one of my fellow hiker’s pockets. It was a picture of The Happy Han Man. This very well may have been the first photo of himself he had ever seen. Given his enthusiasm I think this is a safe assumption. Eventually, we arranged for him to carry my pack to the base of the mountain where I could find hydration and rest. In exchange for this I gave him my $20 Wal-Mart digital watch he was so taken with. I definitely got the better end of the trade, but you would have thought I had given him $1million.

Looking back on this entire event I realize I was pushed to the brink like never before. The water I drank was lukewarm and dirty. I slept in a small two man tent with leaches covering the roof fearful they’d find their way in. I was hot. I was dizzy. I was exhausted. I was scared. However, I’m forever grateful for this experience. It taught me to find comfort in the most uncomfortable of circumstances. It challenged my sense of survival and heightened my appreciation for the comforts we enjoy daily in a way nothing since has.

Go become comfortable with the uncomfortable.

You rule!

Jason